1
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What is your recommendation for dealing with an angry person lashing out at you?

2
00:00:05,450 --> 00:00:08,636
Do you ignore them and go straight to paying attention to the rising and falling?

3
00:00:12,422 --> 00:00:13,625
Yeah, no, never do that.

4
00:00:13,665 --> 00:00:20,537
Rising and fall, there's nothing special about the rising and falling of the abdomen.

5
00:00:22,745 --> 00:00:31,300
There's one thing special, it's quite easy and coarse and obvious, so it's child's play.

6
00:00:33,063 --> 00:00:46,626
And so it is, I remember when I first started and I did this exact same thing, this exact thing when people were yelling at me and I didn't know what to do, I just closed my eyes and went back to the rising and falling.

7
00:00:47,028 --> 00:01:05,847
it doesn't really work because you've got this intense headache and and and tension and stress because this person is making you all upset and so you're not actually cultivating objectivity you're not actually meditating

8
00:01:08,290 --> 00:01:10,956
You should never ignore anything.

9
00:01:11,077 --> 00:01:14,044
The point is, don't ignore the present moment.

10
00:01:14,585 --> 00:01:18,956
The present moment at that moment is this person lashing out at you.

11
00:01:19,036 --> 00:01:25,692
So you can close your eyes, you can keep your eyes open, but what you should be focusing is on where your mind is.

12
00:01:26,566 --> 00:01:36,019
If your mind is not interested, if you're so highly developed that you're not interested, oh this person's lashing out at me, okay well back to my meditation, then absolutely that's fine.

13
00:01:38,042 --> 00:01:49,198
If it doesn't bother you and your mind doesn't even go out there, you know the person's there, you say to yourself, hearing, hearing, and then just ignore them and go back to your rising and falling and it's just like birds chirping and fine.

14
00:01:49,178 --> 00:01:59,893
But if it upsets you, or if you're at all interested in it, and it's highly unlikely that you're able to really put this out of your mind unless you are highly developed.

15
00:02:01,496 --> 00:02:09,988
So your mind, even if it's not upset, it's going to be going back to focusing on what this person is saying, all the nasty things they are saying about you.

16
00:02:09,968 --> 00:02:14,455
In which case that's what you should be focusing on, saying to yourself, hearing, hearing.

17
00:02:15,376 --> 00:02:23,589
And once your mind does let go of it, if at times your mind is no longer interested in it or the person stops yelling, you can just go back to your rising and falling.

18
00:02:23,609 --> 00:02:25,352
You should also be noting the emotions.

19
00:02:25,452 --> 00:02:32,162
If it does give rise to emotional turmoil, like you're upset or angry or if you find it funny or if you feel...

20
00:02:32,142 --> 00:02:40,040
If you feel somehow egotistical, often we feel proud of ourselves that we're able to not argue back and you should watch that as well.

21
00:02:40,701 --> 00:02:43,086
Not think you're better than the person because they're lashing out.

22
00:02:43,167 --> 00:02:50,944
Oh, this person is such a low spirituality.

23
00:02:52,105 --> 00:02:53,307
such a low being.

24
00:02:54,429 --> 00:02:57,635
I don't know what the word is.

25
00:02:57,775 --> 00:02:59,919
They can't even control their temper, that kind of thing.

26
00:02:59,939 --> 00:03:00,900
You should watch that as well.

27
00:03:00,920 --> 00:03:03,785
You should watch all of these things and be mindful of them.

28
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Replace the judgments with objectivity and mindfulness.