One, is it possible to transfer the merits of good deeds to a departed person?
Two, is it possible to reconnect with a departed person in any way?
Well you can of course transfer the merits of good deeds to a departed person.
The question which I assume is what you're asking is whether it actually gets to them.
which is another question entirely.
I think the standard answer is that it may or it may not, but I think if we're going to be open-minded or kind of objective about it, that it probably always gets to the person in the following way.
The standard way of understanding
the transferring of merit is that maybe, just maybe, those beings are hanging around as ghosts and waiting for somebody to do something and dedicate it to them so they can rejoice in it and receive the merit of rejoicing in someone else's deeds, which apparently can have profound effects on the psyche of a ghost because they are
They are ethereal beings.
They're fine material.
Just as when angels get angry, they're very quick to fall from the state of being an angel.
An angel can actually die by getting angry.
They're so susceptible to emotions.
So if a ghost really feels validly appreciative, like something has really been done for their benefit, on their behalf, then they can very quickly receive the benefit of that
But why I think it's actually more widely applicable than just for ghosts is that there's no categorical difference between a ghost and, say, a human being.
We're more coarse of an existence, more coarse of a being.
So the coarseness gets in the way of transferring merit, gets in the way of the person receiving it.
If you take the example of simply sending loving kindness to, say, another human being, there are many ways, well, there's more than one way in which you can understand that that person receives the benefit of your loving kindness.
I mean, people will often relate, and this is anecdotal, that after sending loving kindness
the person on the receiving end suddenly feels happy even though they might be at a distance so I don't know whether that would even hold in a clinical trial like if they were to do a double-blind scientific study as to whether advanced meditators could actually send loving-kindness and if you received in that way but regardless the most secular and rational way of understanding
the transference of merit and loving-kindness is the effect that the transferring has on the mind of the person who does the transferring.
So suppose if the person is alive, which is the easiest case, and you send them loving-kindness, or in this case you dedicate merit to them.
May this be for the benefit of all my relatives, and then you maybe even specify someone, may this be of great benefit to my mother or my father who is
angry at me, upset at me, and so on, then that changes the way you think of that person, which will have a visceral, an actual, an empirical effect on your relationship with them the next time you meet.
You'll find that suddenly they look and seem like a different person based on the changes that have gone on in your mind.
But I would say it potentially goes further than that because every action, of course, has ripple effects in the universe around us.
Whether it actually gets to the person and they feel happy because of something you've done for them, it certainly will affect your life even before you meet the person.
Now, after the person has died, it's only an extrapolation to suggest that if there is a rebirth and if you are born based on karma that
you are far more likely to have a positive relationship with that person in the future, or to work out quicker, more quickly, your negative relationship with the person based on sending them merit.
So in a logical sort of, not secular, but rationalist point of view, it's not
difficult to see or it makes perfect sense, it makes more sense to suggest that there is a benefit that comes from dedicating merit to all beings.
it's goodness to do that, to share the goodness and to wish for other beings to rejoice just the way you rejoice.
Because the biggest benefit of doing a good deed is how it makes you feel, is the effect that it has on your mind.
So when you wish for other beings to get the benefit of your goodness, you're not saying, well, may they become rich based on the money that I've given or so on.
You're saying, may they
become generous, may they change their outlook.
And so the benefit comes from, according to Buddhism, the idea of them getting the benefit comes from their rejoicing in it, or comes from the change in their own minds, which can come about in many ways, including how you relate to the person as a result of giving the dedication.
So there's two kinds of merit involved.
The merit of giving, which changes your mind, and the merit of rejoicing.
There are often mentions made or determinations made.
When you give merit, you think, well, if the person is listening, if they're here right now as an angel or a ghost or whatever, may they receive the merit directly.
If they're not,
May the angels who are hanging around here rejoice in it and on my behalf go and tell that person, that being, wherever they have been born, and so on.
In Thai, they will make that sort of wish or prayer.
That's the first question.
The second question, is it possible to reconnect with the departed person?
Well, obviously not if they've been born as a human or an animal, right?
except by meeting them, by somehow finding them, like the Tibetan lamas and monks seem to be very good.
The astrologers tend to be very good at
But suppose they are a ghost, right?
Well, there are ways, you know, psychics are able to enter into states.
Buddhist meditators are able to enter into states where they're able to talk to ghosts.
I mean, lots of meditators have told me that they're able to see and talk to ghosts.
So whether it's real or not, as a Buddhist meditator, it makes sense to me.
But I think in this case, only if they're a ghost or an angel.
And more likely if they're a ghost, because angels don't tend to have much to do with humans, apparently.
Humans are putrid and have a vile smell.
They say an angel can smell a human being 1,000 leagues away or something like that.
They don't have much to do with that.
That's why you see ghosts far more often than angels, because the angels are quite turned off by us.