1 00:00:00,773 --> 00:00:04,040 What do you think about crying, the Buddhist view about crying? 2 00:00:04,541 --> 00:00:08,569 Sometimes I think about death of myself and my loved ones and I get terrified. 3 00:00:09,632 --> 00:00:15,664 Is the Buddhist teaching to watch such hard experiences in life without judging? 4 00:00:15,965 --> 00:00:17,348 Seems hard to apply. 5 00:00:18,813 --> 00:00:21,076 Well, the Buddha's teaching in general is hard to apply. 6 00:00:22,178 --> 00:00:24,101 For most of us, it's not an easy thing. 7 00:00:24,121 --> 00:00:27,546 So that's a red herring. 8 00:00:27,606 --> 00:00:32,353 Don't write anything off as being hard to apply. 9 00:00:32,393 --> 00:00:39,264 Because impossible to apply or inapplicable would be something else. 10 00:00:39,384 --> 00:00:42,829 But hard to apply doesn't apply. 11 00:00:42,809 --> 00:00:51,377 Thinking about death, that's a good thing, helps us to overcome the state of being terrified. 12 00:00:51,517 --> 00:01:01,966 So you say it makes you terrified, well that's a sign for you that you have clinging, you have attachment to those things that you're terrified of losing. 13 00:01:02,647 --> 00:01:10,013 Because death isn't terrifying, it's something that comes to all beings, it arises, it ceases, it's inevitable. 14 00:01:10,594 --> 00:01:12,816 But the fact that you're terrified about something 15 00:01:12,796 --> 00:01:20,050 is that you, you, is an aversion to that thing happening, in this case losing loved ones. 16 00:01:20,070 --> 00:01:31,311 So you have, you have the Buddhist teaching, piya to jaya te soko, that which is dear, from that which is dear comes sadness, or in this case crying. 17 00:01:32,860 --> 00:01:34,665 The Buddhist view on crying is twofold. 18 00:01:34,725 --> 00:01:44,212 In some cases it can be rapture based, so people who practice meditation can get so enthralled with the practice that they start to cry without any reason. 19 00:01:45,255 --> 00:01:48,203 But in this case it sounds like crying with a reason. 20 00:01:48,183 --> 00:01:51,507 which is a product of sadness and unwholesomeness. 21 00:01:52,007 --> 00:02:05,523 Either way, the physical manifestation of tears is, I'm pretty sure, and I keep telling people this, so I'm hoping the science is correct, is accompanied by endorphins, which are some kind of happy drug. 22 00:02:05,543 --> 00:02:07,966 They actually make you happy and they're soothing. 23 00:02:08,807 --> 00:02:12,992 And so it's evolutionary, something we've evolved 24 00:02:12,972 --> 00:02:22,507 to allow us to keep us from becoming paralyzed when pain or suffering comes to us. 25 00:02:23,729 --> 00:02:32,924 As a result, it's quite addictive and it becomes a response to unpleasant situations. 26 00:02:34,406 --> 00:02:36,870 And in a way that 27 00:02:36,850 --> 00:02:43,941 is actually addictive in a way that we actually use to feel happy, to feel pleasure. 28 00:02:44,723 --> 00:02:46,105 And so it's quite negative. 29 00:02:46,466 --> 00:02:47,507 It can be quite negative. 30 00:02:47,547 --> 00:02:59,787 Crying itself is neutral, but the cultivation of crying, where it becomes a habit, is quite negative because we become addicted to the 31 00:02:59,767 --> 00:03:02,473 actually pleasant states that come from crying. 32 00:03:02,573 --> 00:03:05,480 People say crying is a sad, is an unpleasant thing. 33 00:03:05,540 --> 00:03:15,784 Crying is actually quite a pleasant thing for whatever reason arises because of the physical pleasure that comes from the drugs that you're feeding yourself. 34 00:03:15,764 --> 00:03:17,527 So important to watch that. 35 00:03:17,547 --> 00:03:20,271 When you cry, you should remind yourself crying, crying. 36 00:03:21,152 --> 00:03:30,767 When you feel the pleasure of the chemicals, the endorphins or whatever they are that come from crying, you should say feeling, feeling, or happy, happy, and so on. 37 00:03:31,307 --> 00:03:34,933 If you like it, you should say liking, liking, and that's all. 38 00:03:34,953 --> 00:03:36,054 It's something that comes and goes. 39 00:03:36,175 --> 00:03:38,057 Crying itself is not a big deal. 40 00:03:38,578 --> 00:03:42,444 Sadness is a problem, and of course attachment to the crying is a problem. 41 00:03:42,464 --> 00:03:43,746 These are things that should be 42 00:03:43,726 --> 00:03:49,382 seen as they are and discarded as unessential.