1 00:00:00,200 --> 00:00:10,615 I have not given up normal life just yet, but I fluctuate between the peace of practice and dealing with real life. 2 00:00:11,253 --> 00:00:16,998 How can I deal with the fluctuations of normal life? 3 00:00:17,058 --> 00:00:17,959 Don't give it up. 4 00:00:20,582 --> 00:00:21,262 Don't deal with it. 5 00:00:22,343 --> 00:00:23,204 I don't know. 6 00:00:23,224 --> 00:00:24,726 I ran away from it. 7 00:00:24,966 --> 00:00:25,667 I gave it up. 8 00:00:26,447 --> 00:00:27,648 I said it's not for me. 9 00:00:27,668 --> 00:00:29,670 I don't have advice. 10 00:00:31,752 --> 00:00:32,773 Well, I suppose I do. 11 00:00:33,234 --> 00:00:36,337 But no, it's very pertinent. 12 00:00:36,417 --> 00:00:37,918 That's what we were just talking about. 13 00:00:38,793 --> 00:00:51,308 Well, I think an answer I can give along the lines that I just did that's a little more explanatory is that that's what you have to deal with. 14 00:00:51,368 --> 00:00:53,270 What you're describing is reality. 15 00:00:53,310 --> 00:00:56,313 You are standing with two feet. 16 00:00:58,516 --> 00:00:59,457 I don't know what the saying is. 17 00:00:59,497 --> 00:01:00,919 You're sitting on the fence. 18 00:01:00,939 --> 00:01:01,399 I don't know. 19 00:01:02,641 --> 00:01:04,022 Both your feet are in different rooms. 20 00:01:04,623 --> 00:01:06,285 And so... 21 00:01:06,265 --> 00:01:15,034 Until you decide one or the other, or until you are able to give up normal life, you're not going to find perfect peace of practice. 22 00:01:17,141 --> 00:01:19,549 You're not going to be able to find harmony. 23 00:01:21,082 --> 00:01:34,913 When you say give up normal life, though, you're probably, I don't want to put words in your mouth, but you're probably not describing what the normal everyday person would think of in terms of normal life. 24 00:01:35,454 --> 00:01:38,601 When you're thinking in terms of normal life, you're thinking about 25 00:01:38,581 --> 00:01:50,707 life with less desires, material desires, less stress in your life, less anxiety about the future, less guilt? 26 00:01:50,727 --> 00:01:55,577 No, no, I mean, I'm referring to his idea of normal life in terms of 27 00:01:55,557 --> 00:02:06,272 the other side, the stress part, because he's saying fluctuating between peace of practice and real life, sorry, but he says he hasn't given up normal life. 28 00:02:06,692 --> 00:02:13,802 So what he means by he hasn't given up whatever that is, the normal life in terms of a normal lay person. 29 00:02:13,782 --> 00:02:18,210 I'm thinking of that as the other side of the coin, the bad side. 30 00:02:19,051 --> 00:02:26,303 Normal life being a normal, non-monastic, non-Buddhist, crazy life. 31 00:02:27,425 --> 00:02:36,060 But what I was pointing out, the normal life for most of us is a combination of all those various... 32 00:02:37,610 --> 00:02:39,395 parts of our lives. 33 00:02:39,836 --> 00:02:45,753 The anxiety, the frustration, the anger, the desire, the ignorance. 34 00:02:46,014 --> 00:02:52,632 You don't get rid of that by becoming a monk or any such thing. 35 00:02:52,612 --> 00:03:06,346 But if you don't put yourself in a position to deal with those things directly on a sustained and long-term basis, then yeah, there's no end. 36 00:03:06,766 --> 00:03:08,528 It shouldn't be a question. 37 00:03:09,189 --> 00:03:11,792 You can just bemoan the fact that you have to do it. 38 00:03:11,852 --> 00:03:14,034 It's an observation. 39 00:03:14,114 --> 00:03:19,159 Your observation is quite astute that that's the way it is. 40 00:03:19,139 --> 00:03:28,622 And many people come to this observation, but the problem is they tend to come to it as a question, asking me, how do I make it perfect so I can have my cake and eat it too? 41 00:03:28,662 --> 00:03:35,578 Which is basically, I think, unfortunately, what it is that you're describing, it seems to me. 42 00:03:35,558 --> 00:03:47,475 And so rather than trying to find a static way to deal with it, slowly move yourself towards what you think is the better option. 43 00:03:47,515 --> 00:03:52,142 I mean, obviously you accept the fact that meditation brings peace because you say it. 44 00:03:52,903 --> 00:03:56,067 I don't suppose you think that normal life brings a similar peace. 45 00:03:56,188 --> 00:04:04,840 So accept the fact that one is better than the other and start moving towards the one that is better. 46 00:04:04,820 --> 00:04:05,627 As best you can. 47 00:04:06,030 --> 00:04:08,350 So that calls for more meditation. 48 00:04:08,532 --> 00:04:10,715 Well, no, no, actually. 49 00:04:10,755 --> 00:04:24,434 It calls for, well, yes, but it also calls for making steps to provide yourself with a situation where you can undertake more meditation, changing things about your life. 50 00:04:26,537 --> 00:04:37,932 But one of the best ways to do that is, yes, I agree, to do more meditation, mini meds, as you say, and being mindful more in daily life, that kind of thing, will change your life. 51 00:04:40,274 --> 00:05:03,328 Now, what I was going to say is if you can't do that, if you're at your limit, you've maxed out your Dhamma credit card and you really have to, you know, you have children, for example, or you have debts or obligations of other sorts to your parents, for example, then you just have to accept. 52 00:05:03,308 --> 00:05:14,874 And learn an important lesson is that actually meditation is not necessarily going, doesn't necessarily need to be peaceful. 53 00:05:15,014 --> 00:05:18,482 An arahat can have a lot of 54 00:05:18,462 --> 00:05:25,391 difficult situations and can appear to be faced with a lot of suffering. 55 00:05:25,411 --> 00:05:27,473 The difference is they don't suffer based on it. 56 00:05:27,994 --> 00:05:38,927 Arahant, enlightened person's life may not be and I would say oftentimes is not roses and clover, is not just fun and game or not just peace and happiness. 57 00:05:39,047 --> 00:05:42,732 Well, it's not 58 00:05:42,712 --> 00:05:43,753 calm waters. 59 00:05:44,594 --> 00:05:54,266 An Arahant will be surrounded by their karmic buddies who have come to square up their karmic differences. 60 00:05:54,366 --> 00:05:56,429 So a lot of crazy things can happen. 61 00:05:56,549 --> 00:06:00,334 Bad people can surround Arahants because of their bad past karma. 62 00:06:01,175 --> 00:06:02,897 Crazy things. 63 00:06:02,877 --> 00:06:20,496 And so we should be willing to follow that example and accept the fact that our lives, even as monks, very much so, even as monks, may not be peaceful, calm, tranquil. 64 00:06:20,577 --> 00:06:23,122 We may have to deal with a lot of crazy stuff. 65 00:06:26,109 --> 00:06:26,470 We do. 66 00:06:26,730 --> 00:06:27,973 We do have to.