Is it better to start following the path having a happy ego instead of doing it out of suffering?
For instance, the Buddha had a good life before escaping the forest.
He never suffered personally.
Is it better to have lots of suffering or only little suffering?
I don't think it's, as they say in Thai, maikyo.
That's of course meaningless to all of you.
Nothing to do with it.
Wasn't there a whole long time where Siddhartha fasted and starved himself and denied himself of all kinds of things?
That's because of bad karma that he still had to, even the Buddha still had to do away with, according to the commentaries.
No, I guess I can see.
Sorry, there is a connection there that you have to see suffering.
You have to see that there's a problem.
It's all suffering.
The Buddha did suffer.
He was surrounded by suffering.
It just wasn't suffering from our point of view.
Another thing you can think of is that a person who is used to so much pleasure, things that would not faze most of us,
would cause intense displeasure and suffering.
So just seeing a sick person shocked him, not only because of his pampering, but also because of his great wisdom, more because of his great wisdom.
But still, you can think that that's generally the case for rich people.
When a rich person sees a poor person, it can be quite disturbing just to see someone who is dirty and poor and so on.
Whereas if you're poor, it's not such a big deal.
seeing dirty people, seeing something ugly, something dirty.
So I don't think living a life of pleasure makes you any less susceptible to suffering.
Let's put it that way.
This is a real fallacy that is a misunderstanding in our mind.
We think that people like the Buddha must not have had any suffering.
Well, regardless of whether he did or not, think of the state of being, you know, if you're talking just because he was rich, think of the state of being a rich person.
From a Buddhist perspective, there's nothing, as I just said, there's no reason to think that they suffer less.
They'll suffer for far less than we will.
Hello, people.
uh... uh... uh... uh... uh... uh... uh... uh... uh... uh... uh... uh... uh...
then you really, really want to become free from suffering.
But I don't see the correlation there.
Everyone has suffering.
It's whether or not they have the wisdom to see it as suffering.
People can be surrounded by dead people and still be horrible.
People who work in morgues, I don't know if it actually happens, but you hear rumors of
necrophilia right these guys work in the morgue and they're surrounded by dead people and still get turned on by it that's kind of thing so it's it's not you know it's not to say that that all you have to do is see lots of dead people or see lots of sick people um
What you do see, rather, is that, for example, people who look after sick people, it's easy to miscorrelate, I think, because you see people who look after sick people can be very wise, like nurses, for example.
I had to deal with both nurses and doctors, mostly nurses, because when I was in America, because many Thai women come to, and men, some men, but more women, go to America specifically
to become nurses.
There's a nurse shortage in America.
And so everyone in Thailand is studying nursing.
I don't know.
Many women in Thailand are studying nursing with the thought that they can go to America, earn some money, and come back home and support their parents.
And so I mean, really good intentions.
And so they make really good meditators.
And you really get a sense of their kindness.
And looking at the difference between nurses and doctors is interesting, but probably for another
time but that has to do more with their the good that they do working with sick people when you have these two things put together the association with suffering and the cultivation of goodness which is perfectly exemplified by a nurse hospice care workers for example I
It has much more, I would say, to do with the goodness that you have, the goodness in your mind.
No, let's say it has to do with both.
You do have to experience suffering, but you need the wisdom to understand it.
Because look at the Buddha's example.
29 years, right?
He lived a life of luxury and didn't even think of going forth.
Why?
Because he still hadn't seen suffering.
So it is necessary.
And so to use the Buddha as an example of someone who started the path out of happiness, he certainly didn't.
He started out the path horrified by what he had seen, mortified by it, just totally bummed out.
There was one Buddhist teacher, he was asked about depression.
He said, you know, I'm depressed.
Do you think I can practice meditation?
And he said, well, you know, the Buddha was pretty bummed out when he went forth.
Because he was, really.
He was bummed out.
He realized that his life had been useless.
What he was doing was meaningless.
Kind of like waking up out of the Matrix.
He was realizing that he was in a bubble.
Yeah.
It was an illusion.
So what makes a person see suffering?
Two things.
You have to be presented with it, and you have to have the wisdom.
You have to have the goodness.
For all of us, something that I personally don't mention nearly enough is the importance of goodness, the importance of doing good deeds, the importance of helping people.
It's so undervalued in Buddhist circles, the simple deeds of, like a nurse, what a nurse does, helping people.
It empowers you.
It makes you feel good about yourself.
It clears your mind.
It takes out your selfishness and your greed.
doing charitable acts and helping other people is incredibly important for allowing you to cultivate wisdom.
Western Buddhists like to skip this all and just jump to the wisdom part.
So it's really dealing with things that they're not capable of comprehending.
You can be as brilliant and intellectual as you like, but without the goodness and the power of mind that comes from
being a good person you you simply fall into views and speculation it has to come from the heart yeah so one thing is uh being a good uh follow your heart and the first one don't follow your heart don't follow your heart you never follow your heart never
Well, I mean, never tell people to follow their heart.
Never take that as a rule.
It's funny because it actually, tam tai in Thai, for example, is a very, very negative, has very, very negative connotations.
Whereas in English, follow your heart is like what you're supposed to do.
I don't know if that's the difference between Buddhism and maybe the Judeo-Christian tradition or modern consumerism.
No, no.
I use that term quite often to follow your heart.
I'm sure that's not related.
If it's related to Judeo-Christianity... No, no, I think it's related to modern consumerism, materialism.
follow your desires.
It's the same thing.
It's saying the same thing.
But I thought in Thai, heart and mind were like the same thing.
Sort of.
Not exactly.
So following your heart would be similar to following your mind.
No, but that works in English, but it doesn't work in Thai.
Tam means to go after.
It doesn't mean to
follow in the sense of tam du.
Yeah, actually you could, and I think they use it as a play on words.
Tam du jai.
If you put the word du in there, it makes sense.
If you follow, looking at your heart or your mind.
Yeah, and Buddha said... Following your heart means listening to your heart, letting it lead you by the nose.
Yeah, Buddha said that the path is not on the sky, the path is on your heart.
but that's it.
Maybe I don't have certified materials or Buddhist.
I just watch videos on YouTube, and there was like Buddhist quotes.
You haven't heard that.
That's how I started Buddhism, watching videos on YouTube.
I didn't quite get what you said.
No, I remember that.
So, okay, that was about being happy when you start the path or starting out of suffering.
And more for the suffering side, but for people who have wisdom to see it.
I think you have to show people suffering.
It doesn't mean that you should hurt yourself or so on, but you should be willing to put yourself in situations that open your mind up, open your heart.
And if you just live in a bubble and stick with what's comfortable, you'll never be challenged.
This is the deal is that people are never challenged.
Their beliefs are never challenged because everything around them is designed to support and confirm their beliefs.
So they live in a bubble.
No.
I'll tell you one thing.
If you are so dissatisfied about basically world, the reality as it is, you're so dissatisfied about it.
what like there's a lot of anger like and sometimes it's hard because once you become like you see this dissatisfaction then there's a lot of anger instead of peace you have to actually fight going to the extent that hey
I don't want to be here.
Actually, I'm not talking about material.
You can have money.
It's got nothing to do with money or material possessions, all right?
If somebody has a lot of money, you can become aware of the same thing.
No problem.
But then you can say, well, why I'm here?
And then I'll say, hey, I didn't choose it.
I'd rather commit suicide because I'm so dissatisfied about it, really.
Because everywhere is dissatisfaction, really.
Every material thing holds dissatisfaction.
No, the mind holds dissatisfaction.
OK.
That's where your problem is, though.
Wow.
For example,
You want to, let's say, you want to live in a sterile life.
If everything is so, you know, in reality, everything is so imperfect.
You want to live in a sterile environment, then the wanting is the problem.
Yeah, well, I just don't want to accept the imperfect world.
I don't want to live in an imperfect world with imperfect people.
It's going to be a problem.
Sorry?
your inability to accept is going to cause problems for you as far as I can see.
Yeah, I don't feel comfortable with accepting everything, right?
So... Then that's a problem for you.
That's always going to be a cause for suffering for you because you're not comfortable with it.
You're not comfortable with what you'll have to be faced with.
Yeah, but why should I?
Me, myself, I could be... I didn't... If I was a god...
If I was a god, I would arrange this world... That's an interesting question.
Why should you?
I mean, only you have the answer to that.
You've made your bed, now lie in it.
Actually, that's not what it means.
It means exactly, as a man makes his bed, so he lies in it.
Yes.
I practice that.
It's German.
Okay.
I don't have an answer for why should you, but you do.
You have two choices.
You can become comfortable with what you're uncomfortable with, or you can continue to be uncomfortable with it.
Two choices.
You know, even if I change myself and I become a better person,
It's kind of satisfying because you need satisfaction because you're going to be depressed if you're not going to be satisfied or happy about something.
I think so.
I think if you don't have any... If you don't have anything positive about yourself,
in your life, then you become depressed.
So you become better, even if you become a better person.
That's a false dichotomy.
You don't have to be either.
You don't have to be either satisfied or depressed.
You can just be at peace.
You can give up both extremes and just be, you know?
Like when you see the depression, you can take it for what it is, become comfortable with it.
Comfortable in the sense of not worrying or becoming upset by it or even being interested in it, except as just for what it is.
And when you feel satisfied or when you feel something that you think that'll make me satisfied, then instead come to see it simply as it is, not as truly desirable or pleasurable or satisfying, but just as an experience.
Ah, okay, so just cut off the emotional baggage of all of it.
So don't take it emotionally off.
Right, neither side.
Sometimes you'll be depressed.
The key to this very, very common problem is to be okay with it.
Don't be afraid of the depression.
Whatever you're afraid of, that's what's going to destroy you.
When you're afraid of something, you give it power.
It only becomes a problem because you think it's a problem.
When it's just depression, it's just depression.
Isn't that silly?
It's such a... People kill themselves over depression.
You know what?
Depression... I wouldn't say depression is much suffering.
It doesn't have to be a problem.
Anyway, we're kind of...
Very interesting topic.
Maybe I should quit this video about kind of a philosophical one about whether it's better to start off happy or suffering.
I think what the key was for this person's question was whether you should... I thought they asked it another way earlier or someone did.
Was whether you should...
enjoy life first kind of thing.
Whether you should become like the Buddha where you're rich.
This sounds like a little bit of a... It's funny how I'm reverting the tile.
You get on your own side.
Kind of taking your own side on this.
Well, maybe I should go through life first.
Really experience all the joys and the pleasures of life.
and it's really lying to yourself because that's what you're saying what you're talking about is not simply enjoying the pleasures of life it's cultivating trying to find more which is not just the pleasure it's the attachment and the desire very very dangerous so if there's that kind of thing where I should be really really
happy first, then you're just going to cultivate addiction, which is just going to make it more difficult to follow the path.
So no, I don't think that would be useful, if that's part of your question.
We got a nurse out there, it looks like.
Nurses rock.
Right next to teachers.
No, I mean, like, as this poor joke, I mean, like, public teachers, and again, it's not all, I mean, not all nurses are nice people, I don't think, but people who teach children, public school teachers, can be really radiant and wonderful people and make very good meditators.
I guess I have to couch that because I had some pretty bad teachers.
But I was a horrible student, so I deserved it.
I remember we made our teachers cause so many problems for them.
But what I mean is you get something out of it by helping people, by giving people, by being concerned about other people.
Teachers, they do think about their students, and they want their students to gain something.
They're giving something.
So it's not to say that teachers will become enlightened or so on, but it's that they have great potential because of the fortitude of mind that's required in order to do such a good thing for someone.
So these are just theories.
I mean, I just pick up these theories and it's based on observations that could be totally false, but it seems to me that nurses and teachers tend to be
up there as far as who makes a good meditator.
Yeah, getting out of yourself is always a good thing, you know, to just get out of your own head.
And service helps to do that.
Yeah.
But it does more than that.
I think it makes people strong.
There's this inherent quality of good karma.
This is karma.
Karma changes you.
It fortifies the mind.
Look, the Melinda Panha has an interesting section about being able to send goodness to other people.
How you can actually send the benefits of good things that you've done to others and dedicate it to them.
And pray for them to be happy.
Pray for them.
But King Melinda asks, can you do that with bad deeds?
Very interesting question.
Who would have thought of such a thing?
If you do lots of bad deeds, can you say, okay, may that person go to hell as a result of my bad deeds?
How would you answer such a question?
Well, Nagasena was brilliant, of course.
And he said no, because bad deeds collapse in on themselves.
They shrink.
They cause a person to shrink.
Good deeds expand outwards and bring power and greatness.
So they can be expanded.
They can expand you.
But bad deeds cause you to implode and are thus not possible to be shared.