At the top there, when I practice meditation and focus on the breath, I feel like I'm controlling it too much instead of letting go and seeing clearly.
How do I deal with this?
This is a big problem in my progress.
Anybody want to start?
So I take it when you're meditating,
and you're, let's say if you're focusing on the rising and falling of the stomach wall, are you saying that you actually feel like that you're controlling the rise and falling rather than actually noticing, well, noting the rise and the falling?
Because I think from my own experience, that's the kind of, the thing that I've experienced initially when you first start to
sit and meditate because obviously you're focusing on the rising and falling and as you get into the meditation you start to note other things like thinking and pain and hearing and all the other aggregates that arise during the meditation so I don't know if that's what's happening or it's a different kind of meditation where you're focusing on the breath passing through the nose
But I think to start with, you have to focus on it initially, which can sometimes perceive that you're controlling it.
One of the big aspects, well, the key to any question is asking what is the reason for asking it.
looking at what is the reason for asking.
The key here is in where you say, I feel like I'm controlling it too much.
Because we can say that there's something wrong with control in and of itself, but the real problem here is the fact that there's something unpleasant going on, and that's suffering, which is really an important thing, because no one wants to suffer.
So the key to your problem is not necessarily to look at the control.
That's what comes from misunderstanding the suffering, from misunderstanding reality.
Based on misunderstanding reality, we try to control it, which actually creates more suffering.
When you look at the suffering, and look at the experience as it is, and look at your disliking of it, looking at, you know, based on Paticca Samuppada, right, this, looking at the various pieces as they arise, looking at the feelings, looking at the object, looking at the
liking or disliking of it, looking at your intentions based on the liking and disliking of it.
You'll come to see that it's not worth controlling.
You'll come to teach yourself that there is no... it doesn't admit to control.
And so you'll naturally stop controlling.
The worst thing is when you get frustrated about your control and try to stop yourself from controlling because, of course, that's just adding further attempts to control the situation.
I would say to focus on the reaction to the control and focus on the object of the control.
Because control is already wrong practice.
And so if that's going on, then there's nothing you can't react to wrong practice.
You're already practicing incorrectly at that moment.
So you focus on what it is that you're reacting to incorrectly, and you'll teach yourself to react correctly.
And then you won't control.
So when you feel uncomfortable and discomfort, for example, in the stomach, which is a very uncomfortable thing, especially if you're controlling it, focus on the discomfort
discomfort, discomfort, or pain, pain, or feeling, feeling, and liking, or disliking, disliking, and so on.
And for sure you'll find, well, that's the key to retrain yourself.
So you start with rising and falling, and this is what we're expecting to see.
We're expecting to see that the mind reacts incorrectly, suffering for itself.
And...
deal with that or retrain our minds based on wisdom and understanding.